We Will Not Be Asked What We Have Read But What We Have Done - Thomas a Kempis

The Back of the Napkin by Dan Roam

I ordered this book yesterday. I can often remember sketching out ideas on napkins–sometimes alone, at other times with team leaders. Often, those pictures led to insights that produced significant changes, or solved plaguing problems. I’m a believer in Roam’s philosophy: almost any problem can be made clearer with a picture. Fortunately, according to Roam, solving problems has absolutely nothing to do with drawing pictures or innate artistic ability. It’s has to do with forcing us to think visually.

Visual thinking means taking advantage of our innate ability to see - both with our eyes and with our mind’s eye - in order to discover ideas that are otherwise invisible, to develop those ideas quickly and intuitively, and then to share those ideas with other people in a way they simply "get."

The process of visual thinking is comprised of four steps, each of which we’re already good at. Looking, seeing, imagining and showing.

Do an experiment.

Take a problem you’re facing in building movements on your campus or location. For example, how do we build healthy missional teams? How do we raise up missional team leaders? What can we do to "passionately proclaim and compassionately demonstrate the gospel" in more effective ways?

Apply Roam’s Method: get some napkins, a pen and: look, see, imagine and show.

Look at your data, at your problem, at your opportunity:

* What is there?
* What is not there?
* What do you know?
* What do you not know?
* What does it look like?

See what it means:

* Do patterns emerge?
* Does anything stand out?
* Have you seen this before?
* Is it analagous to something else?
* Should you go look some more?
* Can you draw some conclusions?

Use your mind’s eye (or a whiteboard or pen & paper or software) to imagine the possibilities:

* Are there analogies that make sense?
* Are there better ways to represent the patterns I saw?
* Is there a basic framework upon which I can hang what I’ve seen?
* Can I manipulate the patterns to create something new?

Show your insights to others (and help them draw their own conclusions):

* This is what I saw
* This is what I think it means
* Can you see the same things?
* Do you see something different?
* I recommend we do this; what do you think?

Try to get your audience to repeat the process: look, see, imagine…?

Now, as you work on your "show", use Roam’s 5 Squid Questions to force you to clarify your thinking:

“Surprised by Hope: Rethinking Heaven, the Resurrection, and the Mission of the Church” (N. T. Wright)

I’ve been binging on N.T. Wright of late–reading several of his books, listening to mp3 lectures from the ntwrightpage.com, etc. etc. I’ve read and heavily underlined his latest book, Surprised by Hope, annotating in the margins over and over “wow, is that true?, amazing, etc. etc.” It has rocked my theological categories in significant ways. Fearful that I might be walking into theological peril, I’ve read this book in one hand and several systemic theologies in the other. Now, looking back, I finding it my top read for 2008. Read this book, you wont regret it!

As Tom (those who are N.T.’s friends call him Tom — and so, as a product of my “binging” I’m granting myself “friend” status) describes, his unpacking of the resurrection does not challenge orthodox Christian belief, it simply reminds Christians what “the orthodox Christian belief about the resurrection is” and how many of us have replaced it with a more gnostic, Platonic dualism that sucks out the power of Jesus’ bodily resurrection and its implications for hope and for mission.

Tom argues very persuasively that the Christian hope, built upon the foundation of Jesus’ bodily resurrection for the dead, has never been about ‘life after death.’ It’s always been about ‘life after life after death.’ (see: 1 Cor 15, Phil 3) In other words, going to heaven when you die (understood in our thinking as our disembodied spirit in the presence of Jesus) has never been the Easter hope.

The ultimate destination–the heart of the Christian hope:

is not “going to heaven when you die” but being bodily raised into the transformed, glorious likeness of Jesus Christ. . . [This bodily, physical resurrection will take place] when Jesus comes to set everything right. Our salvation then is not going to heaven when we die, but “being raised to life in God’s new heaven and new earth.”

Now, the implications of this orthodox belief–recalled and rethought—are manifold. I couldn’t put Tom’s book down as I read chapter after chapter of how Jesus’ bodily resurrection and ascension affect both my understanding of salvation, the kingdom of God, and the full-orbed mission of the church. Recapturing the New Testament teaching about the resurrection, for example, argues that salvation is:

1) about whole human beings, not merely souls

2) about the present, not simply the future;

3) about what God does through us, not merely what God does in and for us.

In one of his other books, “For All God’s Worth: True Worship and the Calling of the Church”, Tom explains:

You see, just as that early Christian belief in the resurrection of Jesus was a belief about something that actually happened within this real world, not simply a belief about a transcendent dimension, a spiritual or other-worldly reality which leaves this world behind, so the continuing message of the resurrection is precisely not that ‘there is a life after death’. There is, and all God’s people will inherit it; but the point is that it won’t be what most modern Westerners think of as ‘life after death.’ It will involve God’s people being given new bodies, like Jesus’ body, to share in the new heavens and the new earth that God will make. The message of the resurrection is that this present world matters; that the problems and pains of this present world matter; that the living God has made a decisive bridgehead into this present world with his healing and all-conquering love; and that, in the name of this strong love, all the evils, all the injustices and all the pains of the present world must now be addressed with the news that healing, justice and love have won the day. That’s why we pray ‘Thy kingdom come, on earth as it is in heaven’. Make no bones about it: Easter Day was the first great answer to that prayer.

You see, if Easter faith is simply about believing that God has a nice comfortable after-life for some or all of us, then Christianity becomes a mere pie-in-the-sky religion instead of a kingdom-on-earth-as-it-is-in-heaven religion. Or, if Easter faith is simply about believing that Jesus is risen in some ’spiritual’ sense, leaving his body in the tomb, then Christianity turns into a let-the-world-stew-in-its-own-juice religion, instead of a kingdom-on-earth-as-it-is-in-heaven religion. If Easter faith is only about me, and perhaps you, finding a new dimension to our own personal spiritual lives in the here and now, then Christianity becomes simply a warmth-in-the-heart religion, instead of a kingdom-on-earth-as-it-is-in-heaven religion. It becomes focused on me and my survival, my sense of God, my spirituality, rather than outwards on God, and on God’s world that still needs the kingdom message so badly. But if Jesus Christ is truly risen from the dead, Christianity becomes what the New Testament insists that it is: good news for the whole world, which warms our hearts precisely because it isn’t about warming hearts. The living God has in principle dealt with evil once and for all, and is now at work, by his own Spirit, to do for us and the whole world what he did for Jesus on that first Easter day. (pg 64)

I could unpack more of Tom’s case for the resurrection and the implications of this broader understanding of salvation, but I want to get this posted and out as soon as I can. All I can say is this: understanding the implications of Jesus’ resurrection has ignited this feeling in me: “I am more excited about following Jesus now than I have been in 30 years.”

Wright Interview

I recently finished Tim Keel’s “Intuitive Leadership: Embracing a Paradigm of Narrative, Metaphor, and Chaos” and loved his notion of leadership as a posture. Concerned how “models” (leadership models or ministry models) are contextual and not easily transferable, Tim argues that its helpful to think in terms of “postures.” A posture is a way of positioning oneself; it refers to one’s bearing or attitude. A “forward leaning” leadership posture positions the leader, for example, toward action or toward openness and receptivity.

Tim holds that leaders of churches (or movements) should adopt the following postures of engagements that allow them to see and respond to the possibilities that are available because of God’s activity out in front of them. Each of these postures lean away from the “posture of the expert or of the leader who knows all.” Such postures keep the leader open to the possibilities in his or her context.

As you read thru these, think of implications to your movement leadership, not of direct applications per se.

1. A Posture of Learning: From Answers to Questions

Leaders can often learn more from a well-formed question than from a glibly offered answer . . . I’m finding that questions require more work, more attentiveness to what is happening in the environment. It takes a lot more depth, presence, and creativity on the part of the leader to ask a well-formed, sensitive, and sincere question that engages the person on the other end of the relationship. We have to ask in order to learn . . . we have to ask in order to engage. . . What if leaders refused the posture of expert and took on the posture of humble and engaged learner? What if leaders learned the art of the question?

2. A Posture of Vulnerability: From the Head to the Heart

Leaders discover ways to engage both the head and the heart. The people we lead need to be engaged in more than cognitive ways; we as leaders need to discover as well ways of leading that allow our own hearts to be engaged. Passion flows from a heart fully engaged. And to engage the heart, the leader must be present and help his people be present. Being present is hard because it means engaging pain–it involves brokenness and vulnerability. But as we engage pain and the brokenness of our hearts, we live deeply and connect deeply. This posture of vulnerability in leaders gives them access to the hearts of their people. Leaders must become conversant in the language of the heart.

3. A Posture of Availability: From Spoken Words to Living Words

Leaders are like OT prophets who were often forced by God to live lives that proclaimed God’s message beyond mere words. A prophet’s words were the final expression of a process that began with God’s working internally. Hosea must marry a unfaithful wife before he can plead God’s words to a faithless Israel to “return to me and call me “My husband.” Jeremiah must buy property in a doomed Jerusalem to pronounce a future hope. The content of the message is integrally linked to the person communicating it. Leaders shouldn’t be surprised that God allows them to suffer first, to experience pain and discomfort, to hear God’s voice out of the whirlwind. Leaders must resist the temptation to evade or anesthetize pain. Instead, they must embrace it. Do we allow life’s challenges to be our trusted teacher or a hated foe? Leaders must embrace the former.

4. A Posture of Stillness: From Preparation to Meditation

Tim suggest that leaders consider the difference between comprehending God and apprehending God. Apprehending God involves beholding the mysterious reality of God in a way that does not seek to place limitations on his nature that he doesn’t place on himself. In other words, leaders can often get caught up in the constant activity of study and preparation to “present” God to their people. Yet, God wants us to be present to him–to move from preparation to meditation. Preparation means doing research and finding material that supports and illustrates our research. But meditation is deep and intimate conversation with God on God’s terms–simply allowing oneself to be present in stillness before the God we serve. Can we as leaders stop ourselves from constantly preparing to do something so that we might have the possibility of engaging Someone? What if we postured ourselves in stillness rather than constant activity?

4. A Posture of Surrender: From Control to Chaos

Chaos theory posits that while we look at chaos and see only unpredictability, randomness, and erratic noise, there is actually patterns and a sort of order that exists. A posture of surrender acknowledges that chaos is not necessarily crisis. Normally, leaders respond to chaos by attempting to take control, but such decisiveness can be dangerous. In chaotic situations, we just don’t have enough information. Surrender, Tim Keel says, forces us to read the environment more deliberately, to become more adaptive and creative. If we adopt this posture, we’ll ask a different set of questions in the seeming chaos. Where are the patterns? In the midst of disruption, where are the opportunities? In crisis, we want control. In chaos, we want discernment and must be willing to surrender control so that we can better engage the changing environment.

5. A Posture of Cultivation: From Programmer to Environmentalist

Movements depend upon relationships. By moving from programmer to environmentalist, leaders avoid the default position of relieving people from the hard work of building relationships, from our Christian responsibility to be hospitable. When leaders don’t create, discover or facilitate programs, but rather cultivate an environment of hospitality, they animate the relational ecosystem. Leaders should be environmentalists, not administrators and programmers. We are about nurturing space for people to connect with each other and with God. We cultivate environments of growth. Thinking in those terms leads to significant implications in our leadership—implications, which a “program mentality” could never engender.

6. A Posture of Trust: From Defensiveness to Creativity

All of the previous leadership postures assume a posture of trust on the part of leaders. Most leaders often default to defensiveness however, believing that so much of what we do depends on us and not on God. Moving away from defensiveness to trust in God, and as a result, to more trust in our people leads to greater creativity. We cannot see God at work in his creation when we are crouched defensively behind a carefully constructed wall where we feel compelled to defend ourselves and even to defend God. “When we trust that God is out ahead of us and seek out his life in and around and outside our walls, we engage with freedom and passion the creative possibilities that arise as God engages his creation for his purposes. . . . When we spend the majority of our energy defending the hallowed grounds of our staked-out territory, something vital is lost.” Leaders follow Jesus into the “generative chaos of creation.”

7. A Posture of Joy: From Work to Play

Leaders have a hard time learning to play. Yet Plato once said that you could learn more about people by watching them play for one hour than you could through a lifetime of conversation with them. True. Keel argues that leaders who begin to live in a trust-saturated relationship with God can move from “work” to relief and joy–to play. At the heart of this posture is the notion of Sabbath, where rest and rhythm and celebration acknowledges the true source in life: God. Leaders must consciously move from work to play, play to work, work to play and on. A rhythm that embraces playfulness demonstrates trust in God. It also helps leaders not take themselves so seriously.

8. A Posture of Dependence: From Resolution to Tension—And Back Again

Like chaos, tension can be embraced by the leader. Tension is created when two seemingly opposed realities are held in a dynamic relationship that demands engagement and interaction. Yet, since tension is discomforting, we attempt to opt quickly for resolutions that often maximize one half of a complex reality at the expense of the other half. In each of Keel’s leadership postures, leaders learn to embrace the twin realities in their dynamic tension (questions vs answers, head vs heart, work vs joy, etc) more readily than previously allowed. Leaders tend to be reactive and swing from one extreme to the other. Such reactions, Keel argues, are not generative nor sustainable. To avoid the reactive swings toward quick resolution of tension, leaders must learn to live in and lead out of tension. Again, a posture of dependence and trust on God’s creative and dynamic work must be present in the leader.

I just finished this lovely book. I picked it up during the Christmas break to read something light as my grandkids danced around the Christmas tree and thundered throughout the house. Four of those grandkids live in Iowa and being tempted often to call them Little Heathens, I thought the title appropriate.

Actually, I found continual references to this book on the blogosphere as one of the best books in 2007. I listened as well to a podcast interview with the 80+ year old author, Mildred Armstrong Kalish, finding her stories fascinating and amazed that such a “elderly” author could craft such a well-written book. I was not disappointed, every chapter was a delight and made me jealous of a time in American where “hard times and high spirits” walked hand in hand.

Growing up on an Iowa farm during the depression, Mildred shares the stories and experiences of daily life. Here are just a couple excerpts from this very fun book:

On wart removal: Following Aunt Belles’ instructions, I peeled a medium sized potato, took it out into the middle of the dirt road that ran by the farmhouse, placed it on a flat stone that Melvin and I put there, and stomped the potato flat. Then we went back to the house and — this was considered crucial to the healing process — agreed not to look at the stone or to visit the site for two weeks. The theory was that as the potato on the stone disintegrated, the warts on Melvin’s hand would vanish. Every day we looked at Melvin’s hands. By the end of the first week the warts started to disappear. By the fourteenth day his hands were completely smooth.

In winter’s cold: My two brothers also shared a bed, and if the temperature was predicted to plunge toward zero, they declared it a one-dog night and were permitted to sleep with a dog; if the thermometer dropped below zero, then they declared it a two-dog night and enjoyed the pleasure of both Beans and Toby (the family dogs). . . .

Grandpa was particular about his tomato plants. He preferred the Abraham Lincoln, and every fall he mashed a carefully selected specimen onto a newspaper. As the mess dried in the sun, the seeds would stick as if glued to the newspaper, which Grandpa folded up and placed in a brown paper bag. There the newspaper remained until spring rolled around and it was time to plant the seeds. In our family, the Abraham Lincoln remains the taste criterion for tomatoes to this day.

Mildred on book tour:

Forces for Good: The Six Practices of High-Impact Nonprofits by Leslie R. Crutchfield and Heather McLeod Grant. Jossey-Bass (2007)

Even though the 12 high-impact nonprofits studied by the authors weren’t “spiritual movements” per se, they reflect truths about the social sector (the volunteer, mission-based, nongovernmental sector) in which God is building his Kingdom on earth.

In their intro, Crutchfield and Grant write:

“We don’t have time for incremental change—we need dramatic change if we are to solve the complex global problems that plague us today. The stakes are high on all sides, and we must rise to the challenge. Doing anything less would squander this momentous opportunity to advance the greater good. Fortunately, these great nonprofits—and the lessons we can learn from them—can show us a new way” (7).

On the basis of their research, they argue that great nonprofits follow six practices to achieve more impact. In a nutshell, social sector organizations seeking greater impact must learn how to do the following:

1. Advocate and serve. High impact organizations don’t just focus on doing one thing well. Whether they start out as advocates for the cause or as providing services or programs, they eventually become good at doing both. I’ve already posted below about how high impact movements display a Virtuous Cycle between “evangelism” and “service.” The more they advocate or evangelize for policy change among other institutions and the more they serve, the greater the levels of impact they achieve.

In both practices, these high impact nonprofits are externally focused. The authors write:

“The secret to success lies in how great organizations mobilize every sector of society—government, business, nonprofits and the public—to be a force for good. In other words, greatness has more to do with how nonprofits work outside the boundaries of their organizations than how they manage their own internal operations…Great organizations work with and through others to create more impact than they ever could achieve alone” (19).

2. Make markets work. Tapping into the power of self-interest and the laws of economics is far more effective than appealing to pure altruism. We need to harness market forces and see business as a powerful partner not as an enemy to be disdained or ignored. Great nonprofits find ways to work with markets and help business “do well by doing good.” Many of these nonprofits developed earned-income ventures as a way to leverage market forces to achieve social change on a grander scale.

In this practice, the authors point out that these nonprofits looked for ways to partner with business interests to access more resources for their cause, in the form of donations, volunteers, or cause-marketing. They weren’t afraid to enter into cross-sector alliances that might create wins for both partners.

3. Inspire evangelists. Great nonprofits see volunteers as much more than a source of free labor or membership dues. They create meaningful ways to engage individuals in emotional experiences that help them connect to the group’s mission and core values. They see volunteers, donors, and advisers not only for what they can contribute to the organization in terms of time, money, and guidance but also for what they can do as evangelists for their cause. They create meaningful experiences for individual supporters and convert them into evangelists for the cause.

4. Nurture nonprofit networks. High-impact organizations help the competition succeed, building networks of nonprofit allies and devoting remarkable time and energy to advancing their larger field. They freely share wealth, expertise, talent, and power with their peers, not because they are saints, but because it’s in their self-interest to do so. We too must build and nurture nonprofit networks, treating other groups not as competitors for scarce resources but as allies instead.

Crutchfield and Grant discern a break between the first four practices and the last two. They explain:

“The first four practices are more external; they represent how these groups dramatically expand their impact outside the borders of their own organizations. Each of these practices influences an external stakeholder group with which the nonprofit works so as to do more with less. In observing this external focus, we also realize that working outside the organization entails special practices inside that help these nonprofits relate more effectively to their environment. This led us to discern two additional internal practices that enable high-impact nonprofits to operate successfully in the outside world and bridge boundaries”.

5. Master the art of adaptation. All these high impact nonprofits are exceptionally adaptive, modifying their tactics as needed to increase their success. They have responded to changing circumstances with one innovation after another. Along the way, they have mastered the ability to listen, learn, and modify their approach based on external cues—allowing them to sustain their impact and stay relevant. They adapt to the changing environment and are as innovative and nimble as they are strategic.

6. Share leadership. The leaders of great social sector organizations are exceptionally strategic and gifted entrepreneurs, but they also know they must share power in order to be as stronger force for good. They distribute leadership throughout their organization and their nonprofit network—empowering others to lead. They share leadership, empowering others to be forces for good . The CEOs of these organizations cultivate a strong second-in-command, build enduring executive teams with long tenure, and develop highly engaged boards in order to have more impact.

In “Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ” (Daniel Goleman) Daniel Goleman argues that the distinguishing factor, which separates good leaders from great leaders is not primarily their training or I.Q. but their E.Q.—their emotional intelligence. He writes:

Great leaders move us. They ignite our passion and inspire the best in us. When we try to explain why they are so effective, we speak of strategy, vision or powerful ideas. But the reality is much more primal:

Great leadership works through the emotions. In his research, Goleman suggests there are five basic components of Emotional Intelligence: Self-Awareness, Self-Management, Motivation, Empathy, and Social Skills. Each of these components argue in part that leadership development is personal development. As our E.Q. rises, we answer those fundamental questions of “who am I?’ and “what am I to do with my life?”— elements basic to our purpose and calling in life. At the same time, we empower those areas of our lives that make us better leaders.

Using Goleman’s categories, consider your E.Q. for a moment:

Self-Awareness: Leaders with a high E.Q. know who they are, where they are going, and why. They have a deep understanding of their emotions, strengths, weaknesses, needs and drives. They are honest with themselves. They are continually making progress in “destiny processing.”

Self-Management: Leaders with emotional intelligence are in control of their feelings and impulses. They stay calm and clear- headed under high stress and during crises. They radiate an environment of trust, safety and loyalty.

Motivation: Leaders with emotional intelligence are both passionate and responsible. They have an inner drive to go beyond the minimum, to improve, to do things better and better. They cry over causes.

Empathy: Leaders with a high E.Q. sense what people are feeling. They listen attentively and can grasp the other person’s perspective. As a result, such leaders can get along well with people of diverse backgrounds and other cultures.

Social Skills: Leaders with emotional intelligence manage relationships well. They are intentional at cultivating interpersonal communication skills—seeking ways to interact smoothly. They use these skills to persuade and lead, negotiate and settle disputes. They spend time forging and cementing close relationships.

So, how’s your E.Q.?

J.P. Moreland and Klaus Issler contrast two views of happiness in their excellent book, “The Lost Virtue of Happiness: Discovering the Disciplines of the Good Life” (J. P. Moreland, Klaus Issler).

The first, contemporary view of happiness defines happiness as pleasurable satisfaction–a feeling heavily dependent on external circumstances, often seeking to fill the self with “calories, romance, consumer goods, and social status.” Satisfaction of desire and the right to do what we want becomes the goal of life.

The second, more classical view of happiness defines it as “a life well-lived, a life of virtue and character, a life that manifest wisdom, kindness, and goodness.” At its core, such a life includes a very deep sense of well-being–for we become more unified persons by living for causes larger than ourselves.

I was captured by the contrast between these two views. First, by how much I’ve opted for the first definition and second, by how much the idea of virtue and well-being resonates with my heart. I’m working hard to bring “resonance of the heart” into alignment with the “working of the will.”

Study for a minute Moreland’s and Issler’s break out of these views in the neighboring table. Do you see the contrast, the difference between both views of happiness?

It seems to me that the contrast between celebrity and hero captures the point. Deep down, I want to be a hero, not a celebrity.

Moreland and Issler believe that “classical happiness” reflects the teachings of Jesus and the New Testament, but lack its more distinctive texture. The New Testament gives Aristotle and Plato–advocates of this classical happiness–a core other than a fully satisfied, heroic self. The Scriptures support “classical happiness” but give it a Christ-centered narrative, a Christomorphic grace. (I love to use these big words.)

In other words, the outcome is not a Greek “hero” of virtue and excellence, but a hero–defined by his or her Christlikeness. Jesus suggests that those who “lose their lives for His sake will find it,” And the life we find is a life which is becoming like Jesus. This life manifests the radical nature of the kingdom of God and the fruit of the Spirit.

Eternal life is not primarily one of living forever in heaven, but having a new kind of life now. Moreland and Issler agree that eternal life finds its success in ways like the classical definition of happiness, but it has Christ at the center and as its end. “It is the life lived the way we were made to function; a life of virtue, character, and well-being lived like and for the Lord Jesus.”

Several years ago, I read thru Rudy’s book on Leadership. I wrote down the following reminders. Reviewing them this morning, I found them again helpful as I face the challenges of today.

1. First Things First: Start each day with activities that bring focus and create results.

2. Prepare Relentlessly: When it comes to communication, hit a home run every time.

3. Everyone’s Accountable, All the Time: Don’t let anything slip through the cracks.

4. Surround Yourself with Great People: Nothing is as good as a great team.

5. Reflect, Then Decide: Well timed choices are the most important part of leadership.

6. Underpromise and Overdeliver: Be sure you always exceed expectations.

7. Develop and Communicate Strong Beliefs: Guiding values make leadership work.

8. Be Your Own Man: Take responsibility, don’t hide behind anything or anyone.

9. Loyalty: The Vital Virtue: Honor relationships and stick up for the underdog.

10. Weddings Discretionary, Funerals Mandatory: Always serve people who are in pain.

11. Stand Up to Bullies: Don’t let the little guy get pushed around.

12. Study, Read, Learn Independently: Always keep a learning posture.

13. Organize Around a Purpose: Funnel all activity towards meaningful outcomes.

14. Bribe Only Those Who Will Stay Bribed: Trust people, but check them
out first.

Peter Scazzero’s book, The Emotionally Healthy Church, offers a new vision of discipleship— an approach that really changes people. Scazzero argues most churches and ministries separate emotional health, relational depth, and spiritual maturity.
Our understanding of spirituality often exults the spirit over the other critical aspects that make us human—those physical, social, intellectual and emotional aspects. True discipleship, on the other hand, integrates all the components of our person.

At the heart of his argument, Scazzero argues that emotional health and spiritual health are inseparable. In other words, “it is not possible for a Christian to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature.”

Scazzero offers the following six principles to help you begin to integrate emotional health and spiritual health—first in yourself and then with your disciples.

1. Look Beneath The Surface. Emotionally healthy people take a deep, hard look inside their hearts, asking, “What is going on that Jesus Christ is trying to change?” They know that a person’s life is like an iceberg, with the vast majority of who we are lying deep beneath the surface. Emotionally healthy people invite God to transform those beneath the surface layer that keep us from becoming more like Jesus Christ.

2. Break the Power of the Past. Healthy people understand how their past affects their present ability to love Christ and others. Numerous external forces may shape us, but the family we have grown up in is the primary force that shapes and influences us. Discipleship includes an honest reflection on the positive and negative impact of my family of origin. Scazzero suggests using a simple family genogram to help you gain awareness of the critical issues of your past. (See Scazzero’s book for more details and to ensure a biblical balance to this.)

3. Live in Brokenness and Vulnerability. Emotionally healthy people live and lead out of brokenness and vulnerability. They understand that leadership in the Kingdom of God is from the bottom up, not a grasping, controlling, or lording over others. It is leading out of failure and pain, questions and struggles—a serving that lets go.

4. Receive the Gift of Limits. Emotionally healthy people understand, according to Scazzero, the limits God has given them. They joyfully receive the one, two, seven, or ten talents God has so graciously distributed to them. They don’t try to live a life God never intended. As a result, they are marked by contentment and joy.

5. Embrace Grieving and Loss. Emotionally healthy people embrace grief as a way to become more like God. As Scazzero argues, they understand what a critical component of discipleship grieving our losses is. Why? It is the only pathway to becoming a more compassionate person. To grow, we must pay attention to pain.

6. Make Incarnation Your Model for Loving Well. Emotionally healthy people intentionally follow the model of Jesus. They have learned to follow the three dynamics of incarnation found in the life of Jesus— enter into another’s world, hold on to yourself, and hang between two worlds. As Scazzero realizes, “my most effective discipleship is to be an incarnational presence to another person. It was for Jesus. It is for all his followers.”